Monday Quarterback

I think this is fitting as a title and a topic the day after the Super Bowl. Fly Eagles Fly. I am so reflective, and I get pissed when I do not get all the answers.

I am looking back at the last month and I almost forgot that I stepped up once Danny told me his daughter was upset with me. I am still a bit unclear of what took place that put things into motion. I will remind everyone, his daughter had no qualms reaching out to me for help with a job search and referral in November. That said what I still call bullshit on the comment I made the mess with his daughter. This was all done in a vacuum.

Danny told me that his daughter was caught off guard that I took her off social media. I said should not be a surprise. I was blindsided and I sheltered in place. I said to be fair, I disconnected all involved with the New Year’s Eve debacle, except you. He said you were connected to her. I said I have no idea what occurred and I was going to keep everyone out of the fire as much as I could.

That disclosure prompted me to send her an email, which I have copied below.

Subject: Clarity

I just wanted to take a minute here to clear some things up. I have been doing the best I can to navigate a situation and dynamic that is totally foreign to me. I have tried to do what I thought was best and one I have not been successful in as far as I can see currently. I love your dad so this is really a tough situation. I am not going to do anything that makes it more difficult for him. The break we are on has made things very difficult, I have not spoken to him since before New Year’s and I have not had any time to discuss my feelings or actions. So he had zero idea what I did on Social Media. I did remove our social media connections as well as your brothers, I did this because I did not want anyone most of all YOU to feel any more pressure than seems to be going around right now. I know people read into social media differently than I do, so I have not posted in FB or Instagram, or Twitter for that reason. If that hurt your feelings or made you feel lesser, I am sorry, that was not my intention. I really think you are a wonderful woman and I would never do that intentionally.  I am more of a shelter in place person, which was my intention, to stop the bleeding, I was made aware today that this was an epic fail. I am saddened at what happened and where things are right now, that said I have no idea what that even means. I had wanted to reach out to you but again I do not want you or anyone to feel awkward or obligated. I understand family loyalty more than most, so I took this route in an attempt to take you and your siblings out of this situation. Please forgive me for 1) not treating you as your own person and reaching out and 2) for hurting your feelings. I will forward this email to your father as well after I speak to him. Joyce

There was never a response. I am still questioning all of this. Danny said she did not want the drama. Excuse me? She made the drama. The fact that to this day Danny cannot tell me what happened either is just fucked up. Again they run the show.

What is interesting now is “what does she think about the shit storm?” she initiated. I mean really now she has some of the missing pieces. The comments I made about the kids paying their own insurance and cell phones now must make complete sense. I doubt she would acknowledge it now. I also feel bad because all the cards have not fallen. She probably feels that almost getting kicked out of college in your last semester is the worst of it.

Well baby, sheltering in place is not going to be enough for you. I am sad that she could not have responded. I am also irritated that I am sure she disclosed things for her advantage and in the end they all lost. I guess I should look at it like I won. I could look at it like that but I don’t. It is all pretty tragic.

May all your waves be glassy.

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