So now that I am indoctrinated I have also learned much that will help me navigate the family dynamic. I initially believed that the only wall that was important was Danny. Today I realized it was not.
The fact that his children have dropped their guard and let me in is huge. I know they have had a lot of disappointments and I know the importance of family to them. Again I realized that the walls surround me and I am with them.
Initially, I only saw Danny now I see they are all with me. I am an only child. I never had children so being part of this tight knit group is new. Sure I had a large extended family, but this is different. I have an obligation to each one of them to be true and trustworthy with their feelings and actions.
I have already promised myself that my blog will not reveal their secrets or confidences. I want to keep those things close to my heart. I now see the other dynamics in the family and I will have to keep those in my mind at all times as well. It has now changed an external relationship forever. I did not even think that would come into play before today.
I am not willing to risk any of this. They are all too important to me. I still am having a hard time wrapping my mind around how they have each found a place in my heart. I had no idea I had room for them. I also feel that if they were not in my heart it would be empty.
How did this happen? I am grateful and realize I am blessed, beyond my own expectations. I have become a solid partner in the last four days. It was the partnership I had dreamt with added bonuses. I always told Danny I will side with him in front of the children. I also said if I disagree I skill tell him in private. I will always have him and his children as my allegiance.
I no longer fear how we will mesh our lives. It is happening and a lot quicker than I expected.
May all your waves be as glassy as the ones I am experiencing.