Temptation – It happens

So today I realized something pretty unbelievable. If you are in a place where you think that you are confident and that you have made your choices, temptation will come and it will look you straight in the eye and say “What’s it going to be Joyce?”. Not only did this happen once this weekend it happened twice.

Giovanni reappeared and I know he was my “Heroin”. The song Demons is not lost on me at all.  The song is pretty poignant for me and I am sure for many more out there. The song starts:

“Sometimes they’re in a bottle
Sometimes a pair of high heal shoes
Some come rolled in paper
Some have six strings and only play the blues
Once you meet the devil
There’s no way he’ll let you be
When I’m not chasing demons
There’s demons chasing me
Skeletons in closets
Ghost underneath the bed
They hide out in pictures
And in words better left unsaid
They hang around like perfume
And haunt me like an ancient melody
When I’m not chasing demons
There’s demons chasing me”
My demons always have two legs and have been in my heart and head and have torn me apart in the past. I got by them more than once and it took a hard couple (or more in the case of Giovanni) lessons to move on. My demons have names. My demons reappear. It is the test of my life and my love of Danny and that relationship that I chose.
Today I did a FB live and one of the Demons appeared. It is NOT a coincidence that this weekend was a pivotal point for me and Danny and that both Demons appeared. They Universe was basically asking me “What’s it going to be this time bitch? Is Danny what you want or are you Jonesing again for the Heroin and the other demon?”
I have one unequivocal answer – Demons, you are on your own, go fuck your own lives up. My life is on track. I know my souls purpose on this planet. I have found what I was looking for and it is reciprocal. I would be a FUCKING lost Idiot to say the least if I did not recognize it and move forward, sidestepping this serious drama.
I am not saying I would change the drama of the past. This sounds silly, but if I changed it I would not be here now ready for this life. I am here, Danny, I am waiting and I choose you, I chose you this morning and today when the Demons were at my door at my face, I saw your face and I chose you again. Danny – Oel ngati kameie  – I see you and I choose you.

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