Lies for control

I have previously discussed my mother and my issues with her. Like I have shared before sometimes I actually forget about the things people have said and done to me. These things show you what I dealt with in order to have a relationship with my mother.

When I moved to LA, she told everyone I would be back and she would take me in. It did not seem to play out that way for her so she got creative. The creativity is one thing, the other she forgot was I knew she was a liar and never lived up to her promises.

She came to LA to meet my fiance and his family. She saw him drink a beer and in her mind it was too fast. So when she went home to Chicago, she told everyone he was an alcoholic. He was and is not an alcoholic.

She came home and then told me the house across the street from her was for sale. She said if I moved home, she would buy it for me. The thing about this is that there are always strings and she did not have the capital to make that happen.

She was desperate, spreading these lies, and she never thought they would come back to me. This is from a woman who when she moved into this house, told her neighbors she did not have any children. She lied to our old neighbors about where I lived and where I went. I really wonder if she was just delusional.

I sent out my wedding invites, I received hate notes in them. These were directly related to her need for drama.

When I received the hate notes, I called and left her a message letting her know she was not welcome at my wedding. This woman (my mother) told people and me that I had no business inviting my father to my wedding, an event I was paying 100% of the cost.

To tell you how ridiculous she was, she had a family member RSVP as if they were coming so she would have a seat. She showed up and I did not acknowledge her, even when her niece told me it was tradition. How about you learn that you do not control people.

The disdain I have for lies is in direct correlation to the lies my parents have been living and telling their whole lives. The best line from Days of Thunder – “Control is an illusion”

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