Please put your Balls away – They are scary

So living at the Beach you meet all kinds. I was introduced to 6’7″ Devin by a neighbor. He was a Penn State Grad and seemed like a nice guy. What made him an even nicer guy was that he was devoted to his daughter Topanga.

He shared custody with his ex who worked at the Hermosa Beach Yacht Club, feel free to look that up.  The daughter took a liking to me and my dog. So she would come down to my place and visit. Her dad was very low key. They invited me to dinner and we would hang out sometimes.

This is what I did notice and it was an image burned into my head. He came to get her and we were sitting on the patio furniture in my yard. He was on the love seat and I was on a chair next to him and we all faced center.  Topanga was sitting across from me.

We were more than likely discussing sports, hence me the sporty girl. He starts to talk and I look over and I am not sure what my face revealed but I was freaking out.  His balls were hanging out from his basketball shorts on my side. These were no ordinary balls, they reminded me of balls I had seen on a hog at the Texas State Fair. I am thinking they must weigh 5 pounds.

This made me think of all kinds of things in relation to these balls. How big is the dick attached to the balls? Is he a Donkey? Does he leave bruised on the women he screws with that banging into them? Is he aware the balls are in the air? Does his daughter see this? She was only in 7th grade and I was thinking this is too much for me, how does a child take it? Well I am sure it would not be the first time she saw that if he is that free balling.

Ok the bottom line, Balls are just as unattractive as dicks. No woman wants pictures of either. That said, wear some underwear, tie them up, I don’t know what men need to do. JUST DO NOT LEAVE THEM HANGING OUT. Secondly, this was a clue I would never be with this guy, Redwoods not an option in my woo hoo.

Devin – I am not sure if AC/DC referred to you in Big Balls but feel free to take credit.

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