Little Man Complex with a dash of Racist

I have been on Eharmony and this is one of those adventures. I have to say that these adventures are turning out to be only something I would expect on a sitcom. I am going to change names but I assure you these will be an honest recanting of these misadventures.

I talked to Joe on the phone for over 2 hours so I figured it would be a good idea to meet up. Well first since you all know me I want to say I have not worn glasses since high school, my memory is good and I can put together a thought. So it was interesting to me that someone would put up a picture that was at least 10 years old. A relationship started on a lie or misleading picture can never go well.

We set a time to meet in Santa Monica on Saturday afternoon. I was early as usual. I texted I was in the lobby waiting. When he arrived I was visibly shocked (at least I was sure it was on my face). Note to men: If you think that because the jeans are $250 you should be wearing them think again. To also refer to them as gay man jeans is not winning you points with me either. Just because you have cash or a credit card does not make women think holy crap I better let this guy get in my pants he is wearing expensive jeans with a cheap top. Oh I can be catty with the best of them. I am just saying think about how it is going to be received.

A cocktail or two later to bring up racial jokes and slurs is probably not going to win you any points. ZERO actually you lost all your points times two. I almost forgot to note that he told me my idea of a great drink the Ruby Red vodka and tonic was not good. I should only use Soda. What ever dork!

I am 40 as you all know. Not 20. When it becomes apparent your last relationship was with a 22 year old well the proof is in the pudding. Red flags are going up. Especially when a man refers to him as having a lot of red flags. As Maya Angelou says when people tell you who they are believe them. 

We had decided to get cupcakes initially and I was jonesing for Sugar since I had been clean for 5 days so off we went to get cupcakes. We are getting them and he is saying we need to get them to go. Because he has a great bottle of wine at his house and we are already so close. DUDE back the fuck up. I am not going any where with you and I surely am not getting in a car with you to “your home” I am not that 20 year old. This banter went back and forth and I did not budge. I was heading back to the housewarming I was at before this train wreck.

OK you are saying maybe a bad date Joyce but not so bad. Here you go….
I mentioned the party was at Doyin and Mari’s house. He said what kind of name is Doyin. I said I believe it is African. Doyin’s dad is the quintessential all American came to America with $5 and became a college professor success story. I hold Doyin in very high regard. He then says something about Doyin where there is no return. He refers to him as a Gorilla or monkey grooming bugs off another monkey. SEE YA!!!! This is a successful man who was raised as a Jew. You would think that he recalled the Holocaust? Obviously not.

A friend suggested this post from Avenue Q. Check it out.

This match has been closed and there will be NO further contact.

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